Hello horizontal lover. horizontal is the podcast about intimacy of all kinds, recorded while lying down.

You’re listening to Season 4, my Season of Experiments. During this season, I’m playing with form and format, length and structure, context and content. I’ll be including mash-ups with other podcasts, themed episodes, crossovers, and shows with segments, among other things. Unlike the first three seasons, most of Season 4 will be recorded remotely, so I’m often horizontal across the world from my guest … which is a grand experiment in itself.

This is part three of my 4-episode arc with Kelsey Grant: Love Educator, boundaries expert, writer, singer, witchy woman, & creatrix of various kinds… known on Instagram as @radicalselflove.

Usually, my horizontal recording sessions are between 3 and 5 hours long, and divided into two parts (if 3 hours) or 4 parts (if 5). The first installment — or the first two installments — are available in all the podcast places for all horizontalists, and the second half — or the latter two parts — are available exclusively to patrons of the horizontal arts. One of my experiments with Kelsey’s arc is to divvy things up a bit differently. In this case, my first and third episode with Kelsey (which are episodes 116, and this installment, 118) are available to everyone, and the second and fourth are available exclusively to patrons.

There’s also a bonus sort of grab bag stream-of-consciousness episode we recorded that I’m considering releasing in full as a bonus episode for patrons, or, also in two parts. To be determined, horizontal lovers…

For access to The Full Horizontal, which includes all the part twos (or in this case, twos and fours) going back to the beginning, become a patron of the horizontal arts by navigating directly to patreon.com/horizontalwithlila 

Use that link precisely because creators dubbed “adult” are hidden by Patreon’s search engine. When you become a patron, I also send you a personal thank-you video (with a Happy Dance).

In part one, episode 116. planet friendship (my first episode that’s almost entirely about platonic intimacy) we talked about her nourishing female friend pod and 6-month vetting process, mother-wounds, getting kicked out of the house, emotional release, resisting the codependent parental undertow, & how Kelsey and her best friend heal by re-parenting each other.

In part two, episode 117. an emotionally safe connection (a patron-only episode), we discussed my best friend Marghe, inner circle friendship, virtual and in-person connection, the ability to hold simultaneous conflicting emotions, Harry Potter and nerding out, & the masterful, loving way Kelsey expressed her boundaries to me.

In this, part three, we deliberately got horizontal to talk about sex. We explored cervical, g-spot, and clitoral orgasms, devotional presence and the lack thereof, fantasizing about women during sex, self-reverence, Kelsey’s sexual evolution, from getting kicked out of the house to her Huntress phase to exploration with a virgin to going off the pill to kink to cervical orgasms & betrayal, to self-exploration & crystal dildos.

If you’d like one-on-one guidance from me on your intimate struggles, I now offer Personal Intimacy Roadmap Sessions: 60-minute sessions with a takeaway plan. In other words, sex-positive, judgement-free, compassionate support for what ails you in the realm of sex, love, & relationships of all kinds.

To schedule, email lila@horizontalwithlila.com. If you desire ongoing support of your intimate growth, join the $100 Patreon tier on Patreon.com/horizontalwithlila, and receive a 30-minute coaching session every month!

In next week’s patrons-only episode with Kelsey, we delve into sex that disturbs the neighbors, woundmates and heartmates, the runner & the chaser, dating with intention, the fantasy of her former relationship, overfunctioning & underfunctioning, losing sexual desire, and whether woundmate relationships can become healthy.

Until next time, may you have someone to love, something to do, and something to look forward to. I’m looking forward to the Wednesday night public speaking club I’ve been attending, and getting put on the spot.

Thank you for listening. Thank you for getting horizontal.

Now come lie down with us again, in Canggu, Bali, Indonesia, and Vancouver, BC, Canada.

Hello, horizontal lover. horizontal is the podcast about sex, love, and relationships of all kinds, recorded while lying down.

This is Season 4, my Season of Experiments. This season marks the first time I’ve ever recorded remotely. So, many times, I’m no longer in the same bed as my guest— which is already a grand experiment in itself, as every single episode of my first three seasons was recorded in person, lying down, wearing robes, shoulder-to-shoulder, right next to my guest. As though stargazing, or post-coital, or in the deep hours of a very long road trip.

I’m always saying that I want to expand people’s notion of what intimacy is, and can be. Remaining overseas during a global pandemic has encouraged me to expand my own notion of intimacy. I used to disparage the value of virtual connection... and suddenly, that’s most of what most of us have. And we must figure out how to make it nourishing for us… or go hungry.

My mission holds steady: To make the world a more intimate place. One episode, one conversation, one essay, one video, one session, one workshop, one course, one talk at a time. So here is my current pursuit: to weave the kind of empathetic cocoon that I cultivate in person, in bed, to inspire a blossoming conversation full of raw, revealing, vulnerable, genuine intimacies, with someone who is horizontal literally across the world.

In this, and the following three episodes, I lie down with the delicious Kelsey Grant, known on Instagram as @radicalselflove. She is my new friend. And I feel very proud to say so. Apropos of this season’s overarching intimacy-across-distance motif, we have not yet met in person. I look forward to the day when I can put my arms around Kelsey and squeeze. Kelsey is a Love Educator, an incisive writer, a boundaries expert, a singer and creatrix of various mediums, and a powerfully tender woman. She has a generous laugh, and her wisdom is free of bullshit. She’s in it, she doesn’t pretend to be otherwise, and that’s what makes her a whole, human, and a great leader. I have much to learn from her, and I imagine you will, too.

Half of our episodes will be available in all the podcast places for all horizontalists, and the other episodes will be available exclusively to patrons of the horizontal arts.

You can become a patron right this instant for access to The Full Horizontal by navigating directly to patreon.com/horizontalwithlila 

When you become a patron, I send you a personal thank-you video (with a Happy Dance).

If you seek guidance for your intimate struggles, I offer Personal Intimacy Roadmap Sessions: 60-minutes of judgement-free, sex-positive guidance… with a takeaway plan (your roadmap)! What ails you in the realm of sex, love, & relationships of all kinds? To schedule, email lila@horizontalwithlila.com and I’ll send you a fun form to fill out (well, I think it’s fun; I made it) so I can best prepare for you. One of my happy clients said, “I’ve had a lot of therapy. But you give advice a therapist cannot give.” Bam!

Here, in my first experiment with Kelsey, we scrap the structure, and instead of starting at the very beginning (a very good place to start), as a classic horizontal episode does, we start from the very right now (also a very good place to start) with the question, “What is alive in you?” And that is how this episode came to be all about nourishing female friendship, envy, & backstabbing, the 6-month inner circle vetting process, mother-wounds, getting kicked out of the house as a teenager, emotional release & worrying about the neighbors, swamping, resisting the codependent parental undertow, & how Kelsey and her best friend heal by re-parenting each other.

This episode was mixed and mastered by Irving Gadhoury of IGrecording.com. My cover art was illustrated by Shana Shay, whom you can find on 99designs. The remix of my original intro music was created by kidmental, an acapella beatbox musician, and a Black creator you can support right now on Fiverr or Patreon.

In next week’s exclusive, patrons-only episode, we talk about my best friend, the defining factor of a tier one inner circle friendship, virtual and in-person connection, the ability to hold simultaneous conflicting emotions, nerding out, my weekly Covid-era ritual of Escapist Animated Movie Night, & how Kelsey’s ability to express loving boundaries with me, marks the beginning of a beautiful friendship. To gain access to the next episode (and all the other part twos, or threes and fours going back to the beginning), navigate to patreon.com/horizontalwithlila and become a patron of the horizontal arts!

Now come lie down with us, in Uluwatu, Bali, Indonesia, and Vancouver, BC, Canada.